we're huntin' wrabbits
Call it karma, call it payback, call it eye for an eye, whatever you want to. You can even say I deserved it for my zeal in rabbit population culling…… but ouch.
Out in the back 40 today I was weeding and deadheading to get ready for an upcoming garden tour. Happy as a clam I was lost in my own world until Faithio came back to say hey and see what was up. She spied a huge honkin rabbit and pointed it out to me, none too quietly might I add. Rabbit just stared back at us and continued eating. Grrrr.I told Faith to hang out and watch it’s every move while I went to get Bill’s pellet gun which I am just learning to shoot. ( I was kinda hoping to go to the grave having never used a gun of any kind but my gun virginity is now gone , oh well)
So I came back , noisily loaded the pellet into the barrel while the rabbit just chewed away 2 ft away from me. I aimed and took a shot, and missed. The rabbit did not flinch at all. I re-loaded and shot again, missed, bunny still sitting there just looking at me.
I decided to use the sight thingy which is no mean feat since god did not give me the ability to close one eye while the other stays open so I have to hold one shut with my hand to look through any one-eyed apparatus. Now using my left hand to hold my left eye shut, my right eye looking through the sight, and my right hand trying to hold and steady the very heavy and awkward rifle (don’t get me going on why in gods name it is a rifle and not a small handgun) I take a half blind unbalance shot at the bunny and this time the re-coil of the gun hits me full on in the forehead knocking me back and giving me a huge egg in between my eyes. Great. I am seeing stars as they float around the bunny that is STILL SITTING THERE! ARRRRGGGHHH!!! I had to take a little lie-down with some ice for a while.
Bill is now a pro, a sharpshooter, a marksman. he can re-load speedily and never hits himself. Unfortunately when he gets home at night and we head out to rabbit hunt there are never any bunnies. I guess word travels fast when the time is to make yourself scarce in the garden. So now he wants to shoot robins and such. No No No silly Bill. I must walk you off the path to redneckdom.
Faith is calling me Daffy Duck, amused at my bump and ineptitude and bad language. Although she says she is concerned about my bump, she just keeps laughing at me…….deee-spicable!
Cheryl, This is very, very funny. I hope you are laughing through your pain. The next time I have murderous fantasies about the woodchuck in my garden, I’ll have to remember that I would probably miss if I tried to turn those fantasies into reality. Maybe if the rabbits have enough experiences like this with you they’ll get careless and show up when Bill is around.
I apologize that I am laughing so hard because I really do sympathize with your bunny catastrophe. I hope your forhead egg has gone away and Faith has stopped laughing. I am imagining the swears that must have been floating through the air.
Now that’s what I’m talking ’bout!! Gee, I thought we lived out in the country and did redneck things, but this completely blows away anything I’ve done!!
It’s funny, every time I’m reminded of your eye ‘issue’…laugh, laugh, laugh. And hearing that the bunny basically flipped you off…and you got the goose egg…well that just adds another twist!!
You Jefferson folk – quack me up!! The w-ascally wabbit won!